When An Offer To Help Becomes A Gift of A Lifetime

Tomorrow is Alano's birthday!  Two years really flew by but so much has happened in such a short amount of time.  The transition from a working to stay-at-home mom, the adjustment of raising a toddler and newborn, the nine month long search for an apartment near Legend's school, his first time in pre-kindergarten, the big move "back" to the building I grew up in (with my parents living downstairs from us) and then the diagnosis that altered the course of our lives (including the decision to leave my 16 week business class after eight weeks) and the ankle injury that came out of nowhere.  Then Legend having to start kindergarten in another school as well as preparing for longer hours of extra therapy for Alano was a trip for us.  I don't know how we did it by we sure pulled through it all.  It's not just the events we're dealing with, it's whether we change or stay the same, after all is said and done, that matters.  My family and I are a lot stronger than we thought so far...*whew* thank God!

Then came the second week of posting daily requests for help with Alano's microloan on Facebook and Twitter.  It was daunting to ask friends, family members and strangers alike to chip in a few dollars for his loan everyday but I had to try.  It was even more difficult when admittedly, I expected to get a huge response from my own family over everyone else and it didn't happen right away.  Seeing Alano's post about having an autism spectrum disorder and needing money to get biomedical treatment must've been overwhelming and awkward for some I'm sure.  Others could've just missed the posts by simply not being on the websites as often.  Maybe no one knows what a microloan is and didn't understand what "making a loan" means.  Then there's the thought of putting in a $5 loan that makes them think they're being cheap and therefore won't do it at all.  I can understand all those feelings because I've been there myself!  I have a hard time giving money to charity because I always feel like I have to give something substantial like $50 or so to feel like I gave SOMETHING but in actuality, I can't freely give that much unless it hits me personally in some way.  In this case, I do personally know someone other than my son who has autism.  I have known him for a long time.  He's my husband Travis's first cousin Peter.  Since I met him when he was in his pre-teens almost 15 years ago, I honestly have not sat down and had a conversation with him but I would try to say a few words here and there.  Now imagine that back in the mid 90s, I had no clue about autism, as well as the rest of the world, it seemed at that time.  When I found out Peter had autism, I didn't know what to say and how to act around him.  I just knew that he didn't speak much and was to himself at every family gathering I've been to.  I never stopped to think about what autism was and what he was going through all these years.  Now I look down at my ankle and wonder wow, I can't believe it took an injury to discover this life that he had to live as a child growing up with autism.  The only one in a large family but was surrounded by people who love him regardless.  Now that he's in his mid 20s, he is independent and out on his own.  Now I have so many questions for him and I'm curious to know his story.  I don't know if my husband's family sees the connection.  I only know for now that Alano is going to get all the help I can possibly give him so he too can grow up to be independent, just like his second cousin.  After a few great lenders chipped in, I got an email from a friend who offered to help.  This was not just making a loan, this was an offer to raise the funds in FULL!  After that, my jaw was hung open for two weeks straight and my heart became swollen with hope but also fear of how I was going to repay this person.  Of all the people who I met and have known all my life, I never expected someone who I knew briefly in high school to do what he did.  Immediately when I got on Facebook, I remembered seeing his profile and saying what's up.  I thought of that picture in my high school yearbook of the both of us standing together outside the school with another friend when the picture was taken.  I had to make fun of his balding head right off the bat!  He smacks back with "that's what happens when you have three kids!".  I remember being amazed that he turned out to be a family guy with a lovely wife and three beautiful children.  Then he offers to collect a donation from each of his co-workers at his job, a deed he has done a few times for his friends in the past.  It was really hard to believe it at first and I felt awkward since we haven't seen or spoken to each other since that day we got our picture together over 17 years ago!!  But he was on a mission and as much as I tried to, I couldn't say no.  I just said do what you can and I will be so thankful for it.  Two weeks later, he collected over a $1,000!!!  Then he puts in a chunk of his own money since he felt bad that he couldn't get the full $1,500!  I was ready to faint over the phone when he told me.  Travis was speechless about the whole situation.  We knew that God was at work on this man, just like He was with our apartment, just like He was with my injury, just like He always has in our lives.  I am so grateful, so thankful, so moved by my friend Enzo's generosity and selfless effort to do what he did for my son.  When we met in person this past week, it was as if we've hung out together so many times, especially for our boys!  His two younger boys (he has a daughter who's the oldest) were close in age with my boys and they all hit it off like cousins!  They were wild and got us all crazy that night but they had a blast!  They also have a cute dog that Alano loved to play with!  His feeling from all this is that he was truly blessed to have three healthy children and that his heart would give out when he hears of friends with children who are suffering in some way and tries to help out in any way he could.  As for the rest of the money, my brother-in-law Michael practically swooped in to give us the rest!  He is such a blessing for that!  He could relate since his nine year old daughter (from his first marriage) was once diagnosed with PDD as well and through early intervention, she was able to speak finally and didn't need further treatment!  

If it weren't for Facebook, yes I will be forever grateful for this website!  If it weren't for Lend4Health once again, I will always thank them 100 times over, but mostly if it weren't for a friend like Enzo, Alano wouldn't be able to get the full biomedical treatment right away and it would've been delayed for a long time.  Friends like this are a keeper!  I am honored to have him and his family as a part of our family, for LIFE! 

Much love to you always Enzo!

To update on who Alano will get the biomedical treatment from, I decided to change DAN doctors, thanks to my Rescue Angel friend Beth once again (who I MUST meet in person really soon)!   Unfortunately, Elaine Hardy in New Jersey is too far away.  The new doctor and NEW center will be in Staten Island which is only a half hour from where I live!  His name is Dr. Michael Gabriel of Gabriel Pediatrics.  He actually had built and recently opened up a center for children under the spectrum disorder called the Path Family Center.  It will have so many things going on like classes, meetings and get togethers with other local families, a sensory gym, a hyperbaric chamber and much more.  Alano will not only be seeing Dr. Gabriel but also a nutritionist, nurse and a teacher in the ABA/ special education field.  They will all be a part of his treatment, all under the DAN protocol.  I look forward to going to the orientation next week!

Legend's turning five this Wednesday so we got two cakes in two days, one that may have to be gluten-free casein-free (if I can get the ingredients tomorrow!) and then about three dozen cupcakes to bake for Legend's class the next day 8-P!  I decided to do a Halloween theme for their combo birthday party coming up on the 24th.  It will be small and in my apartment with just the immediate family.  I wish I can invite everyone I know with their kids and have it at some party space for rent but the food, decorations and costumes is the most we can do.  It will be fun to see them dressed with their few cousins coming over.  I also have my costume planned as well...you shall see!  I will have pictures to show in my next post.  

Happy second birthday to my special little guy!  And to my big five year old boy too!  

Thank you Lord for making every word in this post possible to write, AMEN!